Ah…resistance. I have to admit…of all the things that I could focus on, web design is the one that I have the most resistance to. And that’s saying something, LOL. I have a love/hate relationship with it. I always have. It’s really complex, even for someone who has designed as many websites as I have.

Does it get easier? Well, for me, there have been times when I felt that I had a really good handle on it. And then the technology would change…and I’d have to go through another learning curve. I’m looking at these piles of blog/video topics and there are times when it feels exciting to have come up with so many. There are also times when it just feels really freaking intimidating. Like right now.

About computers…I’m blessed that I understand them, rather well (hi, Aquarius, here) and that I grew up using them, way before they were a household thing. I appreciate what technology can help us do, in our lives. But, some days, I’d rather be in the kitchen, cooking. Or I’d rather be singing. Or creating art. Or doing something with my hands, like organizing/feng shui’ing a space. Or eating. Or working out. Or getting groceries. I’d rather be doing some kind of real-world physical sensual thing, than staring at a computer, trying to make sense of whatever technology I’m working with.

Fearless Mudra - Overcoming Resistance
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So, why am I doing this? Why am I taking on this monumental task of trying to make sense of what I’ve learned, over the past 15 years, since I designed my very first website, so that I can teach web design to others?

– I have some real physical limitations, so web design is one thing that I can do, to support myself.

– I want to make the path easier for those who come behind me. That has always been important to me. That’s why I wrote and published my book, as well. So, the fact that it’s a bit of a struggle for me could actually mean that it’s in alignment with my life path, LOL. 

– I want to get past my own resistance. I know that on the other side of it is great power and freedom.

– I hope that, as I help to empower others, I will also feel empowered.

– I love web design because it uses my analytical skills and my artistry.

– If I can really support myself with this, hopefully that will allow me to do other things, down-the-line.

– I’ve had plans for a web design course, since 2018. So, this has been in the works, for a long time, already.

– I feel that teaching is part of my path of self-actualization, in this lifetime. There have been times that I’ve fought that, but I’m actually really good at it and I want to see what I can do with it. This is one path that could allow that to come forth. 

– I want to master course creation and teaching. I figure that if I can teach web design, I can teach anything, and that will open up other avenues for me, as well.

– I want to learn how to use some of the technologies that I’ll be exploring, on a deeper level, for this blog,

– I had some really big setbacks with my portfolio and my clientele, in the past couple of years. Those setbacks were devastating and they knocked me on my ass. I gave up, for a while, thinking that the failure of those businesses and the subsequent loss of those websites and client relationships was completely my fault. So, this is me getting back up and saying, “Okay. Let’s begin again. Let’s rebuild the portfolio.” Hopefully, I will find some fabulous clients and students to work with, through this blog.

– This is potentially scalable. Scalability is something that I’ll be teaching about, because it has to do with being smart about how we leverage our resources, plus feeling well and having more time and energy to do the (other) things that we love.

– Okay, this one seems “out there”, but I’m praying that this will help relieve my obsession with food and my tendency to eat, out of boredom, because it will keep my hands and my brain busy. For example, it’s nearly 8 p.m. and I forgot to eat my afternoon snack. If I can (finally) lose weight, as a result of doing this, it would totally be worth it. On that note, I think I’d better do my workouts, early in the day, because if I get sucked into the computer, right away, sometimes they just don’t get done, LOL.

– There are other websites that I’d like to create, for myself, so I figure that this could be a gateway to those being realized.

– I like doing hard things and conquering challenges. It lights up the warrior within me. – I love writing and I know that i have a gift with it. I’m sure I’ll be doing a fair amount of it, for this blog.

– When I asked the Universe which direction to go in, recently, website design is what kept coming up. I also felt a LOT of heart energy around it. Ultimately, that’s what guides my decisions.

Enough About My Why. What’s Yours?

You certainly don’t need to come with as many reasons, as I did. Maybe your resistance to building your website and business isn’t as fierce as mine, LOL. But, I hope you have at least a few and that two of them do not revolve around money, but are based on your passion, interests, desire to learn and grow, connect, be more fully expressed, etc. You’re welcome to share in the comments. I look forward to hearing about your “why” and what helps you get through your own resistance.

Here’s an article that I found, on resistance. I thought I’d share.

Love & Blessings!

Claire Amber, Fired Up Diva

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